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BOOK

The Other Woman’s Affair is for any man or woman who is in love with an unavailable partner.

  • Learn how you got here and what you can do about it now.
  • Resolve your uncertainty and learn tools to obtain what’s best for you.
  • Take life “off hold.” Learn how to enjoy life even while in limbo.
  • Be able to move forward either with or without him.
Buy on Amazon

Available on May 1, 2016!

What People are Saying

Janis Abrahms Spring, Ph.D Author of After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful

With compassion and concrete tools, DePompo helps “the other woman” reclaim her life.

Windy Dryden Ph.D Emeritus Professor of Psychotherapeutic Studies Goldsmiths University of London, author of over 200 books on cognitive behavioral therapy.

If you choose to be involved with someone who is married, then this guide will help you to do so with eyes wide open and to be as rational as you can be about your decision and all that flows from it

St. Martin’s Press Nichole Argyres, Editor

Dr. Paul DePompo is clearly doing great work in the fields of therapy and counselling. I was impressed with the wealth of knowledge that came through in these pages.

Touchstone / Simon & Schuster Michelle Howry, Senior Editor

It’s a well done project on an important topic.

Gotham Books / The Penguin Group Lauren Marino, Executive Editor

I can definitely see how readers could find this useful.

RADIO

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WGN Radio The Other Side of Cheating

The last thing we would want anyone to do is to put their life on hold for a relationship. Make sure you are taking steps toward your personal goals and then have a timeline for your boundary when it’s too long and you must pull the plug.
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NPR PTSD & Millennials

A part of putting the trauma in the past is to organize it properly so the brain can process it and file it away. It helps to reinforce the trauma as a time limited event.
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ONLINE NEWS/ENTERTAINMENT

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Huffington Post

It is the “answering all questions fully” that starts the painful process of healing and building back trust. Any slight mistruth will lead to further investigating, worst-case scenario thinking and rumination by the spouse.
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About.Com

It is harmful to use the “D” word during an argument, “This is traumatic in a sense because it brings the relationship from one that promises till death – to now to saying, ‘well maybe not-so-much’.” This can bring out a “protective mode” rather than a “problem-solving mode.
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The Hill

Although our veterans with PTSD can now be cured in 10 weeks using CBT, unfortunately in the same time frame, our candidates with their versions of “Strength” will still be the same.
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Redbook Magazine

If your partner is quick to rip apart their exes, guess what? You’re next!
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Bustle

It is important to understand that relationships don’t fail, they run their course.
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The Hill – In Press

The brain believes that the internet is helping you, but when you compulsively use the internet, your own system crashes. There is not enough space left in your hard drive to give you the drive you need in the outside world.
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Your Tango

The relationship has a better chance to work if you speak up. He will respect you more when you are assertive. You have the right to have him understand and validate the relationship you desire. Use phrases like: When ___ happens, I feel ___, and would like you to ___.If he is not receptive, this is a red flag.
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Romper

If you make jokes in public at your partner’s expense, this can show underlying immaturity in the relationship and hints at underlying disrespect.
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Rewire Me

The same criteria that you have for your friendships should go for your partner. If you are dating people that you would never want your potential daughter to date—then incorporate that into your screening process.
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Cupid’s Pulse

Many people, including celebrities, stay stuck in relationships feeling fed-up. No matter how fed-up you are, it can be difficult to take your next step, whether it’s a break-up or make-up. There is no “right decision.” Pain comes and goes. It may be more difficult to stay stuck in the long run.
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Hitched

In order to turn this crisis into an opportunity for a better marriage, actions must speak louder than words!
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Go Banking Rates

“Having little control and power over your finances can lead a relationship to increased stress, arguing and difficulty being able to relax,” he said.
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Glamour

Even if you’ve slept on a certain side of the bed for so long, cognitive behavioral psychologist Paul DePompo, Psy.D., says it’s possible to break the habit, retrain your body, and start fresh. “You can both extinguish your sleep sides by sleeping upside down for a few nights to throw off the pattern,” he explains.
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Redbook

“You should never say ‘I’m sorry’ when you don’t mean it …”
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Woman’s Day

“I have seen many affairs emerge due to online searches and reconnecting to past exes,” he says. “It often starts innocent and ends horribly.”
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Elite Daily

The problem is, your brain can’t start putting this in the past unless it understands that your ex was not ALL GOOD or ALL BAD.
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Simple Practice

The words that therapists use to describe the people they treat also speaks volumes about how they see their role.
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Men’s Journal

Is she breathing hard? Is she flushed and sweaty? “Is she truly flushed, with erratic breathing, looking far less staged than a 3-D version of a Kardashian selfie? Afterward a woman tends to get more energized not less,” says DePompo. If the answer to these is no, you’re out of luck.
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Associated Press

The parent who was cheated on tends to cling to the children while the parent who cheats often keeps distance, initially out of shame. Both parent behaviors can leave children anxious that one parent is devastated and they cannot help them, while they’re hurt and confused about why the other parent is not being proactive enough. The kids are in a lose-lose situation.
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Married My Sugar Daddy

You Cannot Save a Superhero, Only Self-Destruct Trying. Superheroes have their baggage to deal with. Though he has revealed some vulnerabilities to you, it doesn’t mean he wants to deal with them. He show you just enough of his soft human side to help you connect even closer. If he wanted that side of him to dominate, then he would just be Clark Kent!
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Psychology Today

But maybe the best way to look at our morality isn’t labeling ourselves as good or bad. According to Dr.Paul DePompo, a Southern California-based psychologist and author, “Thinking you are one or the other triggers problems when you eventually do a ‘bad’ thing — which we are all capable of — and you may get an inflated self-image when you are doing many ‘good’ things.” A better suggestion, he says, “is to define what a good person is in 3-5 words and rate yourself on this continuum.” If you see yourself at more than half, then “you are a relatively good, yet imperfect person — which ultimately makes you human!”
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20331 Irvine Avenue, Suite E1, Newport Beach, CA 92660
800 317-8010 x1

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